


Lily Evans Was Not Eating

by crossingwinter



Series: Somewhat canonical [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-05-01
Updated: 2009-05-01
Packaged: 2017-11-11 04:16:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/474416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crossingwinter/pseuds/crossingwinter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In times of great stress, sometimes one cannot bring oneself to eat.  Thus it is with Lily Evans, when contemplating the conundrum that is James Potter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lily Evans Was Not Eating

Lily Evans was not eating. This was abnormal. If she did not have an extremely lucky constitution, Lily would be the size and weight of a young killer whale. Rest assured that when Lily Evans does not eat, something sinister must be afoot.

Sirius Black sometimes calls her Mooey—when he isn't calling her Lillins—to get on her nerves and remind her that she does, like a cow, have food in her mouth at all times. He suggested to her once that this might be because, like a cow, she has four stomachs, and if one were empty at any given time, she would starve to death. This afforded him little more than a look of scorn and a slap upside the head.

Lily had learned a while ago that, while she had positions of authority in school, the only way to teach the boys in our year anything, was not detention, the docking of points, embarrassment, threats, or blackmail, but physical abuse. 

(Incidentally, Sirius claims that his family made up Blackmail because in every letter that his ancestors sent, would be a sinister threat that something very unfortunate would befall the recipient if the recipient did not do whatever the Black requested. Naturally, none of us believe him.)

In any event, back to the whole Lily Evans was not eating thing.

Lily Evans was not eating.

Ok, fine, so I am sounding repetitive. But honestly, it's like the second coming of the messiah: it only happens once and you should fear for your life and soul when it does.

She had a plate full of food, but was only picking at it. She sighed ostentatiously, and then pushed the food away.

"Are you all right, Lily?" I asked, carefully.

"I'm fine, Mary. Why do you ask?" she replied, quietly and carefully.

"Well…you aren't eating…"

She laughed. "Don't tell Sirius, he will conjure a coffin to follow me around so that—in the event that I should snuff it from starvation—everything will be ready for my immediate burial."

I laughed too. "My lips are sealed."

"I just have something on my mind…"

"Want to share? Two minds are better than one. The talking cure. All that fun stuff."

Lily hesitated, and only six odd years of knowing her well allowed me to see that she was considering very carefully what she was going to do. I waited patiently, taking a bite out of my sandwich, hoping that she would reach a decision soon. 

At last, she looked up and down the Gryffindor table. There were a couple of first years out of earshot, but we were the only ones in our year who were at lunch yet. Most of our classmates took Muggle Studies during this hour. But, being Muggleborn, Lily and I didn't really have the same motivation that our friends had in studying the daily lives and technologies of muggles. James took the class because he wanted to woo Lily more easily, Remus because his mum was muggleborn and told him to, Sirius to spite his parents, Peter because his mates did, and Alice because she wanted to know what the hell we were talking about when we used words like "television," "phone," and "communist."

"All right," she said quickly and quietly, "but you have to swear on your life and the life of John Lennon that you will tell not even your cat. Do you understand?"

"It must be serious, if I am swearing on John Lennon's life," I mocked, carefully.

"Oh, shut up," she snapped quietly, looking at the firsties again.

"What's up?" I said, serious once again.

"Do you swear?"

"Yes, I swear on my life and on that of John Lennon. What?"

"I like Potter."

"Is that it? You have been getting along better so that doesn't surprise me."

"No. You don't understand. I really like Potter."

"As in Lily and James sitting in a tree?"

"Oh shut up. And yes."

I whistled.

"I never would have guessed."

"Yeah, well, it's easy to stay in a pattern that has worked for years, isn't it?"

"When did this start?"

"Ohh…" she exhaled, calculating, "I would say since about a month ago?"

"In other words, since the start of term?"

"Shut up."

"What’s there to ‘shut up’ about? I'm just trying to be accurate. And what's so wrong with starting to like him at the start of term? Fresh slate after the summer, head boy, strangely mature in a way I never would have thought possible given how he has been acting for the past two years."

"Shut up. I know all that. Believe me, I know. I've been trying to think how and why this happened for the past month and it's useless. I," her voice lowered, "like him."

"What do you mean it's useless. I don't think thinking and talking about it is—"

"Well, given that I started liking him at the beginning of term, doesn't that mean that the seeds of liking him have been around for a while?"

I paused. "I guess. But then again…"

"What?"

"Well, you always fought with him more than the others, even though Sirius caused more damage than James, and had all of James’ obnoxious traits in greater abundance. Maybe…it was…"

"Some sign of understated sexual tension?"

"Yeah."

"That's what I've been thinking," she took a deep breath. "Ugh! Mary, I don't know what to do."

"What do you mean? It isn't that hard. Go out with him."

"Well. There's two problems with that: one, he doesn't ask me out any more, he just jokes about doing it like 'be careful Lily, or I will be forced to ask you out again,' so I don't know if he still likes me the way I like him. Two, I have some pride. If I just accepted when he asked me out…what would that make me look like, hm?"

“I don’t see what’s wrong with that.”

“That’s because he hasn’t been asking you out twice a week since fifth year. I’d feel a bit of an idiot if I just turned around and said yes, wouldn’t I? It would be admitting that I—“

“Like him.”

Lily rolled her eyes, but nodded.

"Then you do, indeed, have a dilemma," I exhaled, leaning back on the bench, trying very hard not to sound as though I was thoroughly enjoying myself.

"I don't know what to—" but she stopped talking at once.

The rest of our year was striding up the table, talking loudly.

"I still don't get what the point of Communism is," Peter was saying.

"Nobody does, Pete. That's why muggles talk about Commies as though they are morons," Sirius replied, matter-of-factly.

"But USSR, China, North Korea and parts of Southeast Asia all have communist regimes going on. So it can't be that pointless. There has to be something there, right?"

"I wouldn't be too sure about that, Peter," said Remus, sitting down next to me. Alice, who had been walking up the other end of the table, sat down by Lily. James slipped under the table to sit on Lily's other side. Peter sat by Remus and Sirius by me, across from James. This was how we always sat, at least, since James and Lily had started being civil. Before, James would sit on next to Alice and Sirius next to Peter. "Voldemort has a following, doesn't he? Why shouldn't Communists?"

"I wouldn't equate Voldemort to Communists, Remus," said Lily.

"The muggleborn rears its head," murmured Sirius in a way that reminded me of a wildlife documentary, "Let's observe, shall we."

"Communism is an ideological struggle based on the thought that economic and social inequality—and even economic and social oppression—is wrong. Voldemort likes the ideas of economic and social oppression, so…"

"He's more like Hitler," I said, for maybe the twelfth time. They hadn't started studying Nazism yet, so they rolled their eyes. They would get there soon enough.

"I was just trying to make a point that sometimes, people don't have to be logical or have a point to get a following," said Remus.

"Ok. Then that works fine," said Lily.

"Can we talk about something else?" demanded Sirius, "I mean sure, talking about political social philosophy is fun and all that, and I certainly enjoy talking about how Voldemort clearly didn't get any as a young man, but can a man have a break? We just had double muggle studies and I'm tired of it." Most everyone smiled or laughed. "I mean, there are surely more important things to talk about, such as Lillins' imminent and painful destruction."

"What do you mean?" asked Lily quickly, and I was sure that her thoughts had instantly turned to our previous conversation. I, on the other hand, knew where this was going.

"Lily, are you feeling all right?" asked James, his voice sounding pained. He took her hand. "I mean, if you aren't you can always talk to me about it, my darling Lily. Oh, your time on this earth was too short. And we never even dated," he sighed. Lily looked mortified, although it was an expression that could easily have been mistaken for disgust or surprise.

"Quick James, you are right there! Feed her quickly, before one of Mooey's stomachs empties!" Sirius urged.

Lily burst out laughing, undoubtedly relieved. She raised a forkful of mashed potatoes to her mouth and ostentatiously took a bite.

"Thank goodness," said Sirius.

"Indeed, thank the heavens. Oh Lily, never scare me like that again," said James, placing his hand on his throat.

"Shut up, the pair of you," Lily muttered.

"Good, the universe has righted itself, Lily is eating again, James is saved from losing his lady-love, we are no longer talking about Communism, will one of you prats finish up and help me with my transfiguration homework?"

"Alice, you need only ask, my dear, lovely, gorgeous, brilliant, kind, generous—"

"Shut up, Sirius, you don't want to come on too strong. I learned that one the hard way," James advised, looking pained as he glanced over at Lily. She ignored him, although there was an imperceptible twitch at her mouth.

"Yes, I will help you," said Sirius. He shoved his entire plate of food into his mouth, stood up (still chewing), and extended his hand to Alice.

"What do you want me to do, walk through the table?" she asked, picking up her bag and walking down the row. Sirius followed her, still chewing.

"What was the transfiguration assignment again?" asked Peter.

"Advanced conjuring essay. Due tomorrow. Remember?" said James.

"Oh damn," Peter stood up and called after Sirius, "Hang on a minute! I'm coming!" fiddled with his bag, took a final sip of pumpkin juice and scurried down the row after his friend.

"Lily, are you sure you're feeling ok? You haven't been eating," James said, his voice quite serious now.

"I'm fine. I just have a lot on my mind."

"Lily," James teased, "NEWTs are months away."

"That's not what I'm nervous about." 

“You shouldn’t feel bad about having thrown Stebbins in detention. The prat deserved it.”

“I know that, and it doesn’t bother me.”

"Then what is?"

"Were you only talking about communism in Muggle studies?" I asked, drawing Remus into a conversation.

"Well, it was communism mostly. Professor McKenna was trying to explain what on earth the Cold War is, and what its purpose is, and in doing so, had to explain the differences between a communist and capitalist society, the iron curtain, and so on and so forth."

("What, Lily?")

("Really, I'm fine James. There's nothing to worry about.")

("You just said that you had a lot on your mind, and that it isn't exams, or Head Girl stuff. Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?")

"That sounds fascinating. I wish I understood it better."

"I'd explain it to you now, except, as Sirius said, I'd like a break. It's really not too fun having to try to explain to a set of pure-bloods how this effects them in any way."

("James?" Lily's voice sounded odd.)

("Yes?")

("Would you go out with me?")

Remus couldn't help it. He stared. I did too.

"Wait, come again?" said James. He looked shocked and confused.

Lily was bright red. It clashed horribly with her hair.

"Would you go out with me?" she said, very quietly but very clearly.

He stared at her too. "All right."

"Great," Lily was still bright red, but she looked quite pleased with herself.

"Wait. Can I ask you something?" said James. His voice sounded somewhere between angry and bewildered. 

"Yes." Lily replied slowly.

"Well, if you've been refusing me ever since I started asking you out, why are you asking me out now?"

"Well. I like you. And you haven't given me the opportunity to accept at all this year."

"So you just figured, hey, why not try?"

"Pretty much."

"Ok." James was still observing her closely. He then slowly, ever so slowly, placed an arm around her waist.

Lily, if that was possible, went even redder. But she did not remove his arm. She looked quite pleased with herself, in fact. She grabbed a-hold of her fork and took another bite her mashed potatoes. And then another.


End file.
